Something I threw together

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Something I threw together

Post by Broken Heart on Tue May 27, 2008 12:07 pm

Please tell me what you think. And I don't mind criticism.

It was the day before the graduation dance. All the girls had their nails done, their dresses picked out, and their boyfriends going crazy because they wanted everything perfect for the next night. Everyone except Joanna Bartley, she didn’t have her nails done, she didn’t have a dress picked out, and she didn’t have a date. The students considered her an ‘outcast’. She technically was, she had curly auburn hair, golden-green eyes, and her fashion wasn’t from this century. But she could careless about her fashion, or what other people thought of her. In her opinion she was pretty; and everyone else was an outcast. Joanna had other things on her mind besides what other people thought of her, like how to save the world from going to war with someone not from this world. You see, Joanna isn’t from 2008. She’s from the year 3521, 1513 years ahead of us.

Joanna’s diary: May 26, 2008 or 3521

This year I’m in is so weird! If you saw their technology you would understand. Their cell phones, you still have to hold them!! Now about their schools, 8 hours long!! Back home our school days are about 5 minutes.
I need something explained to me; I saw some girl wearing the word ‘Hollister’ on her shirt, what in the world does that mean? Then there was this guy with the letters ‘HCO’ on his shirt. Again I say, WHAT DOES THAT MEAN!! But I have no time to worry about words on a shirt. I need a plan, how to save the world from being destroyed!!!

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Re: Something I threw together

Post by Moonlite Knight on Thu Jun 12, 2008 4:38 am

Ooh, that's sounds interesting Very Happy Save the world!

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Re: Something I threw together

Post by 2bAgen. on Thu Jun 12, 2008 3:59 pm

Moonlite Knight wrote:Ooh, that's sounds interesting Very Happy Save the world!
What disaster? hmmm

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Re: Something I threw together

Post by Broken Heart on Wed Jul 09, 2008 4:58 pm

Should I continue this or should I leave it where it is??

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Re: Something I threw together

Post by GoMulchGo on Wed Jul 09, 2008 11:26 pm

I say you should give it a shot. I mean, why not?
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Re: Something I threw together

Post by Moonlite Knight on Thu Jul 10, 2008 7:23 am

I say continue! It sounds really interesting! Very Happy

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Re: Something I threw together

Post by 2bAgen. on Mon Jul 14, 2008 2:01 pm

yep. You should keep going.

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Re: Something I threw together

Post by Broken Heart on Mon Jul 14, 2008 2:03 pm

Really? I was told it was a stupid story *glares at my sister*

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Re: Something I threw together

Post by 2bAgen. on Mon Jul 14, 2008 2:08 pm

It's good. For me anyway. And no-one else has said no yet. Well. Apart from your sister.

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Re: Something I threw together

Post by BPahl88 on Tue Jul 15, 2008 1:31 am

I like it. And yeah, I would give it a shot. Very Happy
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Re: Something I threw together

Post by sweetkiss on Tue Jul 15, 2008 4:25 pm

*glares at Aly* (BH's sister)
Don't listen to her, she a retard! lol
You should continue it =]
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Re: Something I threw together

Post by Broken Heart on Tue Jul 15, 2008 7:27 pm

Chapter One: School

Joanna went to school the next day. It was even more hectic than the day before, and it seemed that the student body had been cut in half. The people who were there looked like chickens with their head cut off!! The only two people not worrying about the dance were Joanna and the person she brought with her Mark Stewart. But he wanted to go to the dance; he just didn’t want to admit it. A girl named Samantha Brown asked him to go, but that’s when Joanna rudely interrupted their conversation and said he was busy.
Mart Stewart, he was tall, about 5’11’’, blue-gray eyes that you could get lost in, and his hair was dirty blonde and spiked. He was gorgeous!! Even Joanna thought he was cute, but she’d never have a chance with a guy like that; she told herself that every time she was with him; which was every minute of the day. The pair was inseparable; you could say they were best friends.
“Can you believe that everyone is going crazy over a stupid dance?” whispered Joanna to Mark as they sat in their IPS class (which is science if anyone doesn’t know).
“I guess” Mark sighed.
“What; don’t tell me you wanted to go?”
“I did, Samantha is pretty, in a vintage sort of way.”
“Aren’t you the one that said you weren’t going to fall for anyone here; because you would have to leave them?”
“I know what I said” snapped Mark “But I want to have some fun while were here, who knows how long that’s going to be”
“Mr. Stewart, Miss. Bartley do you want to share with the rest of the class what you two are talking about” Mrs. Speer yelled “It has to be more important than my class.”
“No ma’am” they replied, as the rest of the class giggled because the new kids were getting into trouble.
“Good now back to the lesson” Mrs. Speer went back to teaching and Joanna decided to pass a note to Mark, so she could finish her conversation.
“I understand that you want to go to the dance. But we need to focus on our mission” Joanna wrote.
“Ya, I know. But are we going to think about that all the time?” Mark replied.
“I don’t know. Saving the world is as new to me as it is to you.”
“That’s such a lie!! Back home you were the hero, everyone adored you.”
“That’s not true!!!”
“Yes it is. Everyone fawned over you.”
“That’s not true! You’re just upset because you don’t get to go to the dance!”
“Maybe I am-“
just then Mrs. Speer took the note, and read it.
Mrs. Speer looked at the two teenagers then back at the note “I would like to see you two after class.”


Last edited by Broken Heart on Tue Jul 15, 2008 9:19 pm; edited 1 time in total

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Re: Something I threw together

Post by Artemis F. on Tue Jul 15, 2008 9:08 pm

Sounds like this is gonna get ugly. Happy Cool!!
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Re: Something I threw together

Post by Broken Heart on Tue Jul 15, 2008 9:18 pm

The thing is Ms. Speer was one of my teachers! Thats how she was in class *cough cough I hated her cough*

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Re: Something I threw together

Post by Artemis F. on Tue Jul 15, 2008 9:21 pm

*laughs* well, if it was that that inspired you, you should thank her. even the most negative people in your life contribute to your thoughts and opinions.
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Re: Something I threw together

Post by Broken Heart on Tue Jul 15, 2008 9:23 pm

Lol, she retired last year..
But she was the one who pushed me to start writting..
So I guess I should've thanked her.. Even if she hated me and got me into trouble about everything I did in her class *thinks about her then shivers*

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Re: Something I threw together

Post by Artemis F. on Tue Jul 15, 2008 9:26 pm

*smiles* ah.
well, my english teacher last year used to steal my Journal of Stories and read it aloud to the class, even if it was romance...
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Re: Something I threw together

Post by Broken Heart on Tue Jul 15, 2008 9:27 pm

Wow..
Sounds interesting!!

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Re: Something I threw together

Post by Artemis F. on Tue Jul 15, 2008 9:32 pm

*blushes* well, i'm not posting any of them here, if thats what your thinking. to 'bad' for young minds.
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Re: Something I threw together

Post by Broken Heart on Tue Jul 15, 2008 9:33 pm

Haha...
You don't have to post them here..
I would be interested in reading them..
You should PM them to me, I always like a good romance

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Re: Something I threw together

Post by Artemis F. on Tue Jul 15, 2008 9:35 pm

*grins* you wouldn't like my stories and it might creep you out to think i wrote them.
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Re: Something I threw together

Post by Broken Heart on Tue Jul 15, 2008 9:37 pm

Trust me..
It wont.. If you knew what my friend wrote, you would understand

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Re: Something I threw together

Post by Artemis F. on Tue Jul 15, 2008 9:40 pm

if you knew what Bran wrote...O.o
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Re: Something I threw together

Post by Broken Heart on Tue Jul 15, 2008 9:42 pm

Ha
No thats scary..
The way you say that

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Re: Something I threw together

Post by Artemis F. on Tue Jul 15, 2008 9:45 pm

*laughs* yeah. it's ok, though, he only shows his worst to me.
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