Five minute writings

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Five minute writings

Post by BlackOpal on Fri Apr 25, 2008 8:23 pm

Like the title said: I just wrote for five straight minutes and didn't stop. It's just an exercise for writer's block. Some of these I might turn into real poems, because they are good ideas, but kind of rambly.
So, just crit as harshly as you'd like. Very Happy



Sophia
Give me your hand
and find your way back to us
Give me your hand
and I'll lead you through the dark

Sophia
We want your husband
We need him
We can't understand him
But we MUST understand him
Sophia
We want your husband
We need him, we need him

Sophia
Crying at birth
Crying and covered in earth
Sophia
Take our name
Take it, don't break it
Carry our name

Sophia
We love you
We swear that we do
We love you, we need you
We just aren't always true
We can't show it but
We love you, we do

Sophia
Your innocence is ours
We made it we take it
We need you to lead us
We need you to keep us
We need you strong
We need your innocence gone

______________________________________________

Why hath thou scorn'd me?
Why must you do so
Why do you spit our love out
As if it tasted so foul
Why do you hand my devotion
My painful, endless devotion,
To a creature who doth not deserve to bear your name
Why do you insist on breaking my heart
And why must you throw me into a place that you,
you, strong and brave and pure,
cannot stand?
Why do you break my wings?
And blame it on myself?
Because I would settle for nothing less than you?
Because I loved you and only you?
Why do I not carry your image with pride?
Why can I not walk upon your earth?
I would not have lost it so easily
I would not have caused you such grief
I bowed to none but you
And that did not satisfy
I bow to none but me
I love none but me
Death is my lover
Sin is my child
And both are me
Because I am no longer part of you

_____________________________________________

The island is warm
It is so very warm
I am much too large for warmth
The waves climb the shores
Stretching towards me
They feel me here, waiting
They feel my loss and my pain
The waves too are rejected by one greater
Their mother, the sea, pushes them away
They grapple at the banks
So they don't have to return
They sense a common trial in me
And they want something
Advice, maybe
Advice from me
Torn from a man who, if I did not love at least I liked
Pushed downwards by my queen
As they are pushed upwards by theirs
We are kin, the waves and I
We share similar thoughts
We are resentful
We are angry
We show the world this
But mostly we accept it quietly
Because there's nothing else left for us

__________________________________________

I don't know why there's the random Shakespearean English in the second one. I was just writing without erasing anything.
I wasn't even really thinking.
Props if you can guess the mythology in each one. If you can't, well, that's okay. Most people won't be able to.
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Re: Five minute writings

Post by Topaz on Fri Apr 25, 2008 10:04 pm

long but good.
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Re: Five minute writings

Post by jeberexa on Wed May 07, 2008 2:09 am

Interesting. I especially like the second one. Smile
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Re: Five minute writings

Post by Moonlite Knight on Sat Jul 26, 2008 4:09 am

Wow, all of them are really good! I liked the second and the last one the most. I have no idea which the first and second one are, but I have a guess for the last one. Is it Poseidon? I don't know why, but I think that.

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Re: Five minute writings

Post by BPahl88 on Sat Jul 26, 2008 2:54 pm

Cool. These are awesome. And you did all of it in five minutes! That's amazing.

(I have a tug to try it soon. Wink )
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Re: Five minute writings

Post by RitsukaofLoveless on Sat Jul 26, 2008 3:00 pm

Deep. I like them.
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Re: Five minute writings

Post by xStarr_x3 on Sat Jul 26, 2008 5:39 pm

I liked them.
The first one reminded me of a book I read.. but can't remember. It sounded almost as if it were like, spirits calling out to the person. =3 Now I remember the story. It was called Daughter of the Something. xD

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