I Am

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I Am

Post by BlackOpal on Sat Apr 05, 2008 10:09 pm

I Am

I am MacBeth
My inactivity is my evil
My confidence is my arrogance
My thoughtlessness is my downfall
I am Artemis
My competence is my cleverness
My loneliness is my independence
My prisoners are my followers
I am Lucifer
My awareness is my light
My thoughts are my rebellion
My life is my ***
I am the Wind
My temper is my usefulness
My speed is my fame
My travels are my comfort
I am a Witch
My mind is my oven
My society is my wart
My feelings are my spells
I am Everything
I am seldom understood
I am seldom misunderstood
I am undefinable, I am indescribable
I am me, defined and described
My self is my soul
My soul is my self

I Am


***

What do you think? I'm not really a poet.
Not at all.
But if you like it. Very Happy


Last edited by jeberexa on Thu Apr 24, 2008 11:47 pm; edited 1 time in total (Reason for editing : Bad words.)
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Re: I Am

Post by Moonlite Knight on Tue Apr 08, 2008 6:49 am

I liked it, it was very good. Smile Espically the Everything part. I liked it the best.

Just one question though, what type of a poem was it, because it didn't have any set meter. There are many poems that don't but I'm just curious.

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Re: I Am

Post by BlackOpal on Wed Apr 09, 2008 10:29 pm

It was freeverse.
I'm not talented enough to write anything else. XD
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Re: I Am

Post by 017350 on Wed Apr 09, 2008 10:44 pm

Moonlite Knight wrote:I liked it, it was very good. Smile Espically the Everything part. I liked it the best.

Just one question though, what type of a poem was it, because it didn't have any set meter. There are many poems that don't but I'm just curious.

Yeah. I'll agree on that. No meter. That would be much better if possible. Oh! And as carino would say:

I was hoping for some crit, but it's just too good!
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Re: I Am

Post by Hazel on Thu Apr 10, 2008 4:56 am

I like it, even with out any type of meter it flows great and is interesting to read.
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Re: I Am

Post by Sofie on Thu Apr 10, 2008 1:36 pm

Beautiful. Maybe by splitting it up in parts you might get away with no meter(my favourite tactic^^) , but in this particular poem, that might also mess up the flow of it. Which would be a pity.

I love it the way it is, anyway. I like the emotion it portrays.
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Re: I Am

Post by BlackOpal on Thu Apr 10, 2008 10:15 pm

Thanks. Very Happy
I wrote another, kind of cheesy one.
It didn't take long, but crit is always welcome.

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The forest weeps
Its tears fall fast
It cannot sleep
It will not last

The sea can keen
Its song echoes
The beach will ween
It does not show

The meadow laughs
The slaughter of
Its newborn calves
Is done in love

The sky breathes sighs
It is relieved
So far and high
Don't feel too grieved
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Re: I Am

Post by Topaz on Sat Apr 19, 2008 9:55 pm

I LOVE it!!!!It's super,super great!!
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Re: I Am

Post by Hazel on Thu Apr 24, 2008 5:38 am

For someone who says she's not a poet that was really good!! I agree with Topaz..that was super super good! I don't think that it was cheesy at all! Very Happy
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