He's Coming for You

View previous topic View next topic Go down

He's Coming for You

Post by Hazel on Wed Mar 09, 2011 8:53 am

I liked the idea for this one, but I think I executed it poorly seeing it's not scary and it's supposed to be fear. Oh well Smile





Yeah....I might do two on fear since I already wrote one on dreams and colors a long time ago XD Anywho, thoughts?


Last edited by Hazel on Thu Jun 16, 2011 7:16 pm; edited 1 time in total

_________________
Message written with 100 percent more love and care than the leading brand!



Hazel, the pizza eating, hand walking, inconspicuous ninja, who secretly enjoys eating ice cream while singing at the top of her lungs and dancing around like a maniac, has mega cool superpowers in which she will one day save the world that always seems to be in peril. That is her purpose in life.
avatar
Hazel
Moderator

Female
Number of posts : 11563
Age : 106
Points :
63 / 10063 / 100

Points 2.0 : 10202
Registration date : 2008-04-10

View user profile http://www.nanowrimo.org/eng/user/619558

Back to top Go down

Re: He's Coming for You

Post by xStarr_x3 on Wed Mar 09, 2011 9:57 pm

xD The only stanza I'm not fond of is the one where you're like "Doomed I am now". It just threw off the flow.
but otherwise, good. Not scary, like you said. But good. xP

_________________
Holleh likes taking evil slumbers. (and stealing candy from babies.)
She's PREGNANT. With a cow. How..?!
Holleh speaks to herself. In dreams.
HOLLEHS: Now come tree-size!
Holleh talks hotter than the sun. ;o
Holleh is an IN-SPURR-AY-SHUN. Believe it.
She thinks an artichoke is a type of fish.
She also gives lap-dances. To beds.
Holleh can van like a man.
avatar
xStarr_x3
Elite, Supreme, Whiz, Prodigy, Super-Duper World-Class Writer

Female
Number of posts : 7005
Age : 22
Points :
35 / 10035 / 100

Points 2.0 : 5901
Registration date : 2008-05-22

View user profile http://www.freewebs.com/awhisperinthedark

Back to top Go down

View previous topic View next topic Back to top

- Similar topics

 
Permissions in this forum:
You cannot reply to topics in this forum