tis not a poem per-say but i'm counting it as one. forgive me!

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tis not a poem per-say but i'm counting it as one. forgive me!

Post by WritingInsomniac on Tue Jul 06, 2010 4:33 am

so this is the "power paragraph" for the story i'm writing. it's kind of poetic. what i'm really looking for is lots of power and deeper meaning in it. it may seem strange not knowing the context it's in.. but i'm trying not to say in case anyone reads it. (could be considered a major spoiler alert). anyhow; read, enjoy, critique, pull apart, reconstruct, whatever you've got to do, fellow writers! (ps.. have to be up in a very short amount of time. i need to cure this insomnia. and also anemia. iron tablets, please! (it's much too late for me, i apologize))

ďCanít you see whatís happening?
Ideas have become sacred while lives have become disposable.
The road weíre on is one that will end sooner than we think,
and someone has to step up and help us cross the canyon.
Why canít it be you?
Of all dreams youíve dreamed, has this ever crossed your mind?
Has the thought of saving all life ever entered into a world where anything can happen?
Why hasnít it?
Villains are just the creatures who didnít have the strength to become heroes.
Donít let yourself become a villain.
Donít grow weak.
Save us.
Save us all.
Whatís to lose?
If you succeed, we will forever be indebted to you,
and if you fail, at least you will rest easy knowing that you were the only one brave enough to try.
Help us, not because you have to, but because itís right

tis the quote. it's got merit to be in the poetry section, right? i spaced it out so it looked more like a poem . i'm witty and a genius. no. i'm just very very tired. yikes ok. looking forward to some feedback! please don't hate me because it's not an honest poem! (and it kind of is!) affraid (i used this smiley only because it makes me laugh every time i post. that is one very scared emoticon!)

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Re: tis not a poem per-say but i'm counting it as one. forgive me!

Post by bibbit on Tue Jul 06, 2010 5:14 pm

wow. I love it. It's very powerful.
I would call it a poem; I don't see why not. (:

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Re: tis not a poem per-say but i'm counting it as one. forgive me!

Post by xStarr_x3 on Sat Jul 10, 2010 8:02 pm

My favourite line..
"Villians are just the creatures that didn't have the strength to become heroes."
There are others, but that one has to be my absolute favourite. ^^
I like the strength and power behind the words. It's an amazing piece. I'd love to read the story when it's done. (:

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Re: tis not a poem per-say but i'm counting it as one. forgive me!

Post by WritingInsomniac on Sat Jul 10, 2010 9:30 pm

i do have the prologue for the story up here.. right now i believe it's titled "untitled sci-fi-ish story." i have the first three chapters written of it and this little poem thing. i'm currently working on an extension for one of my other stories though so i'm not working on this story right now (i am having chapter 4 troubles Crying or Very sad ) anyhow thanks both of you for your feedback!

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Re: tis not a poem per-say but i'm counting it as one. forgive me!

Post by xStarr_x3 on Thu Jul 15, 2010 8:54 pm

Ohh, I'm going to have to go find it. And then read it. (:
I understand the part about writers' block. I just hope it doesn't stop you from completing the story. ^^

_________________
Holleh likes taking evil slumbers. (and stealing candy from babies.)
She's PREGNANT. With a cow. How..?!
Holleh speaks to herself. In dreams.
HOLLEHS: Now come tree-size!
Holleh talks hotter than the sun. ;o
Holleh is an IN-SPURR-AY-SHUN. Believe it.
She thinks an artichoke is a type of fish.
She also gives lap-dances. To beds.
Holleh can van like a man.

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Re: tis not a poem per-say but i'm counting it as one. forgive me!

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